As the eldest of three and the eldest grandchild on both sides I did not have any hand me downs. No hand me down clothes or toys. This thought never occurred to me until I was a parent myself considering whether to accept the kind offer of hand me downs from others.
I am very particular about the children’s clothes and like them to look nice. I prefer certain shops over others as I like the quality. That does not however mean I am a snob (well maybe I am a little but not a clothes snob).
Rhys was the first grandchild for my mum and dad and the first grandson on Martyn’s side so there were no hand-me-down clothes but I gratefully accepted the offer of a bumbo (show me a child who likes their legs being squeezed in to one of these???? No wonder they are always ‘like new’ on sales sites!) a buggy and various other swinging toys. I also was the first of my friends to have a baby so there wasn’t really the offer of clothes. However I was really pleased to be able to offer Rhys’ barely worn clothes to my friends as they started to have their own little boys. I loved the idea his clothes would be worn again by children I knew and loved. Not just sent to a charity shop. I used to silently rejoice when I saw one of Rhys’ tshirts on my friends little boy, it was like glimpsing my little boy again. It was then I realised why people pass on clothes-it’s not because they think you can’t afford to buy whatever you like. They do it for themselves. Because it makes the process of clearing out and admitting your baby has ‘outgrown’ (got bigger, moved on, grew beyond) these items all the more easier. You are not saying good-bye but rather see you again soon.
So when Seren was born i was prepared to accept these offers. I have had some beautiful things passed on from well meaning mummies and been happy to accept. I have in turn passed on some of Seren’s lovely clothes and been happy to think of them going to a good home. So much of what Seren wears is only worn a handful of times. This then got me thinking about the clothes trade and how we now deem clothes to almost be disposable. No one darns a sock any more they just throw it out.
Fashion cycles are moving faster than ever. Fashion brands are churning out styles more frequently in a trend called fast fashion. The clothes are mass produced and are therefore more affordable meaning we buy more and more often. However the real cost of cheap fashion is the damage to the environment, Human nature means we are more likely to dispose of something cheaper as opposed to more expensive items. So actually by sharing and passing on children’s clothes we are being environmentally friendly! I will continue to offer my children’s clothes to others as I think it’s a dreadful waste to throw them away.
I do however think there is a hand me down etiquette
The Do’s and Don’t’s as I see them
Don’t pass on clothes with holes or stains
Do accept thanks graciously
Don’t pass comment when you see a child wearing clothes you have shared. Once you’ve shared you have severed your ownership.
Do silently enjoy seeing clothes that were your’s being worn and loved again.
Don’t advertise the fact you have passed on clothes. The agreement is between you two mummies.
Do pass on clothes-it’s good for the environment!
Mrs Os Musings 